


get a little bit nervous

by louistomlinsons



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bottom Zayn Malik, Farmer's Market AU, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, M/M, No Angst, Smut, Top Liam, why's that not a tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-14
Updated: 2019-03-14
Packaged: 2019-11-18 02:44:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18111641
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/louistomlinsons/pseuds/louistomlinsons
Summary: Liam goes to say something, probably something dumb, but he chokes on his spit, coughing loudly. The man in front of him is one of the prettiest people he’s ever seen in his life; he’s got thick eyelashes that fan out and frame his dark eyes and tanned unblemished skin. Liam forgets all of his previous thoughts.“You okay, mate?” he asks, concern filtering into his voice.“Yeah, yeah,” Liam says, still choking and coughing. “Sorry.”“We all reacted the same way we saw Zayn for the first time,” Niall says from next to him, laughter evident in his tone. “He’s a god, isn’t he?”or, ziam farmer's market au where liam, louis, and niall work at the produce stand, harry and zayn work at the bakery stand, and nobody's straight





	get a little bit nervous

**Author's Note:**

> shoutout to [jess](http://slowlyseducedbycurls.tumblr.com/) for always leaving me the cutest comments and keeping me motivated  
>   
> also you're welcome to message me or be my friend at my [tumblr](http://microlouis.tumblr.com/)

Getting a job at the farmer’s market had seemed like the only natural progression once he realized he needed a second income. Teaching was nice, but it didn’t always pay the bills. Working at the market on the weekends was a way to get another paycheck  _ and _ a discount on organic, locally grown produce. 

He’d become friends with the man who ran the produce stand, Louis, quickly. Every week, Louis put aside the best fruits and vegetables for Liam, and eventually they started hanging out while Louis was at work and Liam shopped around. When Louis had heard that Liam was searching for a second job, he hadn’t even hesitated to offer him a place at the stand. The fact that Liam could pick his own hours and received an employee discount from every stand in the market only sealed the deal.

Which is how Liam finds himself waking up at six in the morning on a Saturday, earlier than he even wakes up for school on the weekdays. Louis had told him there was no uniform, or even a need to look nice, but Liam still puts on his best pair of dark jeans and a button up flannel shirt. He can’t help it. Despite knowing almost every worker at the stand, and seeing Louis’ own uniform of sweatpants every weekend, he still can’t bring himself to put on comfier clothes. Maybe with time.

It’s a short drive to the market, just a few miles away. Sometimes when the weather is nicer, he jogs to the market and buys his things, enjoying the stroll on his way back. He assumes those days are long over, sure he won’t want to walk home after he’s had a long shift at work on his feet. He finds parking easily, nobody awake and downtown this early in the morning, which he’s grateful for. He’s not sure he’s awake enough to fight for parking.

The market is dead, still thirty minutes before opening. Louis had told him there was really no reason for all of them to get there so early before opening, but it was a market rule that all vendors needed to be there thirty minutes before the doors opened, just in case. Liam didn’t mind all that much, planning to use the time to prepare himself to deal with people all day long. 

Louis is already at the stand, dressed in his normal apparel of sweatpants and a plain t-shirt. He’s not doing much, just restacking piles of fruit that had already been perfect. When he spots Liam, he drops the basket he’d been holding, causing a loud thump to ring through the otherwise quiet market. Despite almost every stand having at least one worker already there, nobody seems to be talking or making any kind of noise.

“Liam!” he yells, voice echoing. “Thank  _ god _ .”

“How long have you been here?” Liam asks, setting down his bag behind the counter that holds the register. Other than that, there’s nothing that separates them from the people who shop. It’s not like the bakery stand across from them, where they’ve got display cases and counter space to make their pastries; they’re completely in the open. Liam feels mildly exposed already, and the day hasn’t even started.

“Like, a minute, if that,” Louis answers. He kicks the basket of tomatoes closer to the wall and pulls out two fold-up chairs. Sitting down in one of them, he motions for Liam to sit in the other one. “We really just sit here for another thirty minutes.”

“Seems boring,” Liam says. 

“It is.” Louis nods his head furiously, agreeing. “Usually Harry is here by now, so I make him entertain me.”

“Who’s Harry?” Liam asks, catching something in the tone of Louis’ voice. He decides it’s fondness; Louis is  _ fond _ of this Harry person.

Louis whips his head around to look at Liam. He looks almost offended at Liam’s question. “You come to the market every weekend and you don’t know who Harry is? Maybe I shouldn’t have hired you.”

Forcing out a laugh, Liam says, “Sorry, mate. I’m not very observant. I really just come to the market to buy fruits and vegetables from you and then head on my way.”

“Then you’re really missing out,” Louis says to him. He brushes his fringe away from his forehead, looking back across the room to the bakery stand. “Anyway, Harry is the love of my life and he always brings over whatever pastries they don’t sell. All of it is delicious.”

“Hmm,” Liam hums, and the conversation stills after that. It’s not much of an uncomfortable silence, he notes. More like it’s early and there’s not much to say and they’re enjoying each other’s company. It’s nice, he thinks. Next shift he’ll bring coffee, enjoy it and the quiet together. 

Around ten minutes later, still fifteen minutes before the market is even due to open, the lights in the bakery stand turn on and Louis sits up straighter in his seat. Liam goes to ask Louis if that means Harry has finally arrived, but Louis is busy slapping his thigh excitedly. It kind of hurts, actually. He packs a punch for such a small guy,

“Wait for it, he’ll come out here and be so cute,” Louis says in a whisper. “He’s so adorable I want to punch him in his face. He always wears his hair in a bun and a white apron, but he still manages to get flour all over himself.”

Louis makes some kind of strangled noise, the rest of his speech dying off in his throat, as a man appears behind the counter. From Louis’ description, the man has to be Harry. He’s got his hair pulled into a bun, like Louis said, and wearing a white apron. He’s also dressed in dark jeans and floral blouse. Liam wonders why if he always goes home with his clothes all ruined from the day.

“Is that him?” Liam asks, but he can tell from Louis’ blush and previous description that it has to be.

“Is that him?” Louis says incredulously. “ _ Is that him _ ? Liam, babe, come  _ on _ . You know that is the most adorable man you’ve ever seen in your whole life. Just look at him, being all stupid. He just fucking tripped over thin air.” It’s true, Harry seems to have tripped over nothing; one second he’s standing still and flipping through a binder, and the next he’s gripping the counter for balance.

Liam holds his hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry I asked.”

Louis definitely looks like he’s going to reply, some snarky comment probably, but he cuts himself off when he spots Harry waving at them. His face breaks out into a smile that looks like it could split his face, waving back eagerly.

“Who’s your friend?” Harry calls, only having to raise his voice a little to be heard in the otherwise quiet market. 

“Liam,” he answers, redness rapidly spreading across his face. Liam doesn’t think he’s ever seen Louis look so flustered, or look anything but perfectly suave and put together. “It’s his first day.”

“Welcome, Liam!” Harry greets, waving a whisk in the air. “I’ll make sure to bring over some of my famous chocolate chip cookies later. Any allergies I should be aware of?”

Liam shakes his head. “Nope, thank you! I really appreciate it.”

Harry just nods, going back to whisking  _ whatever _ .

“See what I mean? Just the most perfect angel.” Louis sighs wistfully, slumping into his chair. “I have no idea how to ask him out.”

“I say just go for it,” Liam says with a shrug. “What’s the harm?”

Louis turns to Liam and rolls his eyes. “There could be plenty of harm, actually. He could reject me and then I’ll have to quit my job. And since I run the stand, that would be a whole lot of awkward. Who would I sell it to?  _ You _ ?”

“I’m going to pretend like that isn’t offensive,” Liam says with a matching eye roll. “You’re being overdramatic. He seems like a nice enough guy. If he rejects you, he’ll probably still bring you cookies.”

“Yeah, consolation guilt cookies.” He looks like he wants to say more, but thinks better of it. “You sound like Niall. He says the same thing. Which is better than what Zayn tells me, I guess.”

Liam knows Niall, the only other worker at the stand. He usually does the closing shift, showing up halfway through the day. Liam sees him once in a blue moon, when he and Louis switch shifts. He figures he’ll see him more frequently now, if only for a few minutes at a time.

“Who’s Zayn?” he asks, watching as one of the security workers unlocks the front door. Has it really been thirty minutes already?

“You really know nothing,” Louis scoffs, but not unkindly. “We have much to teach you. Zayn is one of the other workers at the bakery. We all have game and wine night on most Saturdays. You should come tonight. I know it’s short notice, but I like you for some reason.”

“I feel like I should be offended,” Liam says, but his tone is light and he finds himself laughing. “But yeah, I don’t have plans. Maybe I’ll swing by.”

“You just admitted to me that you don’t have plans, so you have to come.” 

Before Liam gets the chance to respond, people are actually walking up and asking questions about the product. Louis answers all of them easily, and Liam watches, taking notes. He definitely doesn’t need any type of training, but he doesn’t know much about produce in a business sense. He catches on easily enough. Most people ask the same questions, so it’s easy to just give the same answers.

His shift is over before he knows it, the six hours passing quickly. Niall comes in to relieve them both, shouting his greetings over to the bakery. Harry waves in return, spots of flour in his hair and across his face. Liam’s yet to see the elusive Zayn, though.

“How’s your first day gone?” Niall asks as Liam grabs his things. “Any middle-aged white women give you any troubles?”

“No,” Liam laughs. He’s always admired how straight forward and matter-of-fact Niall’s been. “Not yet, anyway. An older lady got a little sassy with Louis earlier, but he shut that down pretty quickly. Everyone seems to be a little afraid of him.”

“As they should be,” Niall says, voice trailing off towards the end, almost as if he admires the snark Louis contains. He probably does. “Are you coming to game night?”

“I think so,” Liam says with a nod. “Should I bring anything?”

“Just a cheap bottle of wine and your favorite board or card game,” comes a voice from behind him. It doesn’t sound like Harry’s slow drawl, and Liam turns around to take in the newcomer.

Liam goes to say something, probably something  _ dumb _ , but he chokes on his spit, coughing loudly. The man in front of him is one of the prettiest people he’s ever seen in his life; he’s got thick eyelashes that fan out and frame his dark eyes and tanned unblemished skin. Liam forgets all of his previous thoughts.

“You okay, mate?” he asks, concern filtering into his voice.

“Yeah, yeah,” Liam says, still choking and coughing. “Sorry.”

“We all reacted the same way we saw Zayn for the first time,” Niall says from next to him, laughter evident in his tone. “He’s a god, isn’t he?”

Ah.  _ This _ is Zayn. Okay.

“I put my pants on one leg at a time just like everyone else,” Zayn jokes, reaching out to gently shove Niall’s shoulder. “You must be Liam? Harry sent me over with these. He’s sad he couldn’t say goodbye, but he left when Louis did. He’s always following Louis around like a lost puppy.” He holds out a tin of cookies, and Liam doesn’t know how he didn’t smell them before; they’re freshly-baked and smell incredible.

“They’re adorable, aren’t they?” Liam says with a smile, taking the tin from Zayn’s hands. “Louis basically spent all morning talking to me about Harry.”

“It’s less adorable when you hear it all the goddamn time,” Niall grumbles, but he doesn’t sound all that upset about it. “I wish they would both just get on with it and, like, fuck each other. Or go on a date.  _ Something _ .”

“They’ll figure it out eventually,” Zayn says softly, almost fondly. A gentle smile plays on his lips, and Liam hopes one day someone talks about him like that. “Until then, we will all suffer. Come to game night and suffer with us.”

Liam throws his head back in a bellowing laugh. “You sound so sweet when talking about them, but then turn around and talk about suffering. I’m getting whiplash. I’ll be there though, you’ve convinced me.”

Niall cheers excitedly, pumping his fists into the air. Liam says goodbye to the both of them. Niall gets Liam’s number to text him the details for the game night and also add him to the ‘ _ louis n harry should fuck it out _ ’ group chat. He laughs at the name, finally heading on his way with promises of seeing them in a few hours. Just as he’s walking out the door, Niall calls out behind him.

“Bring the cookies or don’t show up at all!”

 

He isn’t sure why he’s changed his outfit three times in the past thirty minutes. There’s no need to dress up. Niall and Louis had both told him it was a casual affair, and that he should wear clothes he wouldn’t mind wine being spilled on. He should have very easily thrown on a pair of sweatpants or old jeans and been on his way.

That’s not what’s happened, though.

At this point, if Liam doesn’t put on pants and leave in the next twenty seconds, he’s going to be late for game night. He didn’t want to be early, but now he’s going to end up later than fashionably late. Sighing, he grabs a pair of jeans without too many holes and just a plain shirt, unsure of who he’s trying to impress. 

He lives close enough to Louis’ apartment that he can walk, thankful for the nice weather. He doesn’t even need a jacket. It’s only a few blocks, and he figures if they’re drinking, he shouldn’t be doing any kind of driving. 

He reaches Louis’ apartment building just as Zayn does, coming from the opposite direction on the sidewalk. They seem to spot each other at the same time, Zayn’s face breaking into a huge grin that has Liam feeling warm.

“Hey! You actually came,” he says as they reach the door. “I kind of wondered if I’d scared you away.”

“How would you ever scare me away?” Liam asks as he presses the buzzer for Louis’ apartment. The door unlocks and he holds it open, motioning for Zayn to lead the way. 

“Maybe with all the Louis and Harry talk, I guess,” Zayn says with a shrug as he walks through the doorway. Liam follows behind him, taking in the outfit he’s wearing. He seems to have adhered to the ‘casual’ dress rule, wearing black sweatpants and a grey long sleeved shirt. He somehow still manages to look runway ready. It’s kind of ridiculous.

Before Liam can respond, the door to Louis’ apartment flings open and Niall is standing there, smile bright on his face. He welcomes both of them with hugs, taking the bottles of wine from them. Liam enters, carrying the tin of cookies Harry had gifted him earlier and Uno cards held together by a rubber band.

“Uno’s your favorite card game?” Zayn asks quietly, voice almost a whisper. They follow Niall to the kitchen, where Louis and Harry are arguing over something at the stove. It looks like they’re attempting to make dinner, but knowing Louis, he’s probably being more of a hindrance than helpful.

“Uh, yeah,” Liam stutters. He can feel a blush spreading over his cheeks. He’s not quite sure what it is about Zayn that makes him so nervous. “My family and I used to play all the time. Nostalgic, I guess.”

Zayn’s face breaks into a lopsided smile. “No judgement here. It’s my favorite game, too.” He holds up his own deck of cards, although he still seems to have the box for them. “I guess we’ll have to coordinate for next week.”

“You think I’ll be invited back next week?” And Liam would like to say he’s teasing, that his voice stays lighthearted, but there’s a bit of seriousness in it. There’s always the worry that he won’t be invited back, that he isn’t quite good enough.

“Of course,” Zayn says without hesitation. “I’ll make sure of it.”

Before Liam has any time to process this, Niall is shoving wine glasses into their hands and directing them to Louis’ run down dining table. Harry sets plates down in front of them, and conversation flows easily. Liam finds himself fitting in comfortably with the group, never having to mold himself in any way that isn’t genuinely him. It’s a nice change of pace from other friendships he’s been a part of, where he has to change aspects of himself just to be accepted. They make him feel included already.

“So, Liam,” Louis starts after they’ve all finished their dinners and cleared their plates. They’re sat back at the table, not having chosen a game to play yet. Niall mentioned sometimes they never get around to making a decision, so they just don’t play a game even though it’s  _ meant _  to be a game night.

“Yes?” He doesn’t quite like Louis’ tone; he can tell this is about to be a twenty questions type of ordeal.

“Tell us about yourself?”

“That feels like something you say to a first date,” Liam says, shifting in his seat. He’s not uncomfortable with talking about himself, but he is uncomfortable having the spotlight on him.

They all find this quite funny, their laughter entangling and filling the whole room. Liam doesn’t feel like they’re laughing at him, though, which is nice.

“This is kind of like a first date, I think.” Louis leans forward and grabs a regular deck of cards. He doesn’t deal them out yet, but he sets them in front of himself. “I just want to know more about the stranger I’ve invited into my house. Do you have a boyfriend? A cat? What’s your other job like? Why should I trust you?”

“I do have a cat, actually,” Liam says. “Her name’s Pickles.”

Zayn snorts from beside him, muffling it into the palm of his hand.

“And what about the boyfriend part?” Louis asks again, and Liam can tell that’s what this is actually about. 

“No, boyfriend, no,” he answers. “I’m straight, actually, but no girlfriend either.”

Everyone in the room stills. Liam feels like he might have said something wrong. After what feels like years, Niall jumps from his chair, knocking it to the ground.

“We finally have a straight friend!” he cheers, bending down to pick up the chair and sit back down. “I never thought this day would come.”

“Is this...is this a good thing? A bad thing?” Liam is still trying to get the feel of the room. “I really can’t tell.”

“I wouldn’t say straight people are ever good thing.” This earns Louis a flick on the ear from Harry.

Liam still doesn’t feel like he understands what’s going on.

“We’ve never had a straight friend,” Zayn explains. “And it got to be so long, and everyone we met was just gay. It became a bit of a running joke, like how the ‘token gay friend’ is a thing, but it’s actually our token straight friend. You’re it. You’re our token straight friend. Congrats, I think?”

Chuckling, Liam takes a sip from his wine glass. He’s at a loss for words, really. “Thank you? Happy I could help?”

After this, everyone seems to move on. Harry deals out the cards and nothing changes. They play multiple rounds of card games they have to teach Liam the rules to, each of them getting progressively more drunk as the night goes on. Hours later, when all the bottles are empty and they can barely keep themselves upright, Harry calls it a night and helps usher everyone out.

Niall, Liam, and Zayn exit together. Liam goes to ask why Harry isn’t joining them, but Zayn answers before he even manages to get the question out.

“Harry always stays to help clean up,” he says with a shrug.

He parts ways with Liam and Niall once they exit the building, waving with a promise to text them when he makes it home. Liam finds out that Niall lives in one of the other buildings on his street, and they take off in that general direction. It’s silent for a few minutes before Niall speaks up.

“I think Zayn’s disappointed that you’re straight,” he says casually.

“I think you’re a bad friend for telling me that,” Liam says with a laugh. “Aren’t you supposed to keep it to yourself when your friends have crushes?”

Niall shrugs. “Maybe.”

All Liam can do is laugh again. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell him.”

“It’s just,” Niall says with a sigh. “Worth a shot? Nobody told Louis and Harry about their crushes on each other until it was too late and now they’re both too afraid to ruin whatever it is that’s between them, and so now I’m trying a different approach.”

They’re reaching Liam’s building now, just a few feet away from the doorway. “Maybe it would work if I were into men. As it is, I am a poor test subject. Sorry, mate.”

“Right,” Niall says slowly as they come to a stop in front of Liam’s building. “You’re straight. Forgot. I’ll have to go about a different approach then, I guess.”

“You’re wasting your time,” Liam says, unlocking his door. 

Niall only throws his head back and laughs. He starts to walk away, but turns around when he’s a few steps away.

“We’re all a little bit gay.”

 

The week finds Liam almost too busy to think about anything other than his teaching job. He loves teaching, actually. He’s always admired the idea of shaping young minds and being a mentor. Initially when he first started school, he had thought he wanted to teach elementary level children, but by the time he graduated he had made up his mind to teach teenagers. He’s loved almost every minute of it. There’s been some rough patches, but those almost make it more interesting.

Halfway through the week, his phone’s blowing up on his coffee table as he attempts to grade papers. He’s been distracted at best, so it’s easy enough to convince himself to set aside the papers for a break and check his phone. 

Unlocking his phone, Liam finds roughly fifteen messages in the “ _ louis n harry should fuck it out _ ” group chat. It’s mostly just Niall complaining about how Louis spent the whole day detailing what he wanted to do to Harry, both in bed and actual cute, romantic things. Niall said the mushy stuff was worse than the sex stuff, and Zayn agreed with him. 

Liam doesn’t have much to add, not yet as irritated by the pair as Niall and Zayn seem to be, but he sends a “ _ sorry they’re in love xoxo _ ” text and hopes that suffices. It seems to work, Niall and Zayn bouncing off of each other and keeping him entertained. Maybe one day he’ll reach their level of bitter, but as of right now he thinks Harry and Louis’ crushes on each other is cute.

He goes back to grading, not halfway through the stack. He promised his students he’d have all of their papers ready to be handed back by tomorrow morning, and he’s wishing he hadn’t gone and done that. It’s way too much even when he’s at his best, and he’s just not in the right mindset for getting things done. 

Deciding he needs a change in scenery, Liam packs up the papers and his laptop and heads out into the evening. The sun is just now setting, lighting up the sky in pinks and oranges. It’s finally starting to get cooler out, and he regrets not grabbing a jacket before leaving.

Back when he was in school, there’d been a coffee shop he always went to when he needed to spend the night getting work done, studying, or just wanted to get away from it all. It was open twenty four hours, and it always remained a little gem that nobody ever seemed to know about except for him. He still swung by about once a week to do work, but it was normally in the afternoon or early morning. It’s been years since he’d had a need to show up after five in the evening.

The familiar bell chimes above him when he walks through the door, cheeks pink from the light breeze. Liam sets his things down on a table, only one other patron in the whole place, and heads to the counter to order.

“Liam?”

At the sound of the already familiar voice, he drops his eyes from the menu board and meets Zayn’s dark eyes.

“Do you work here?” he asks, and the promptly wants to smack himself on the forehead. Obviously Zayn works there - he’s behind the counter.

“Yeah,” Zayn answers, setting down the rag he was using to wipe down the counters. “I usually work the night shifts here Monday through Thursday.”

“That makes sense why I’ve never seen you here before,” Liam says. He tucks his hands into his pockets, feeling awkward and unsure of himself. “I normally come in the mornings before work or right after work. I couldn’t focus tonight, though, so I figured coming here might help me actually get some stuff done.”

“Then I’ll try not to bother you too much,” Zayn says with a lopsided smile. “What can I get for you?”

Liam orders a decaf tea, heading back over to his table while Zayn prepares it. He pulls out the papers and his laptop, fully prepared to maybe actually get some things done now that he can’t be distracted by his television or cat. All of that goes out the window when Zayn brings the cup of tea over to him, setting it down.

“Are you a teacher?” he asks, glancing at the stacks of worksheets Liam has laid out. “I didn’t know that. I knew you had another job, but.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Liam nods eagerly. He loves talking about his work, and he has a feeling Zayn is a good listener. “I teach high schoolers. Specifically English, although I’ve been blessed with the opportunity to teach both the public speaking and creative writing electives.”

“That’s so interesting!” Zayn says, and it sounds like he really means it. The sincerity behind it makes Liam break out into a wide smile. “Mind if I sit with you and do some of my own work? I like the company.”

Liam pushes his stacks of papers off one side of the table. “Of course, yeah. Take a seat.”

The rest of the night finds Liam not getting half of the work done he wants to, more interested in finding out that on top of Zayn working two jobs, he also takes art classes at the local community college. He had dropped out of school the first time he went, but he was determined to finish. He blushed the whole time he told Liam, almost as if ashamed, but Liam waved away his embarrassment and told him how proud he was. 

Around two in the morning, Liam looks at the clock for the first time since arriving. They’ve spent hours just talking to each other, both pushing away their work and giving up the pretense of getting things done. In the time that Liam’s been in the shop, only three people have come in and Zayn’s known every single one of them.

He’s shocked at how easily the time has flown, and also a bit alarmed that he’s even remotely awake. On any other night, he’s asleep by eleven at the latest. 

“I should definitely head home,” Liam says, voice falling in disappointment. “I’ve got to be awake in, like, three hours.”

“Oh shit,” Zayn says with a laugh. “I’m so sorry for keeping you. You should have told me ages ago.”

Liam shrugs, brushing it off. It had been totally worth it, and he’s sure he’ll still find it worth it when he can barely make it through the day tomorrow. “I’d rather have been here, I think. Even if I didn’t get any work done.”

“Next time we’ll actually get shit done, I swear,” Zayn says, faux seriousness in his expression. “Now get home and get to bed. You’ve got young minds to shape!”

Packing up his things, Liam can’t help himself from smiling. He smiles the whole way home, thinking of the way he and Zayn had so easily fallen into a friendship. 

If the next day he falls asleep during his planning period, nobody needs to know why he’s so tired.

 

Liam finds himself excited for his weekend shift at the farmer’s market, even more so than the previous weekend. He can’t stop himself from attempting to look nice, trying to ignore any reason why he  _ wouldn’t _ just put on sweatpants and a t-shirt. In the end, he throws on dark jeans and a plain t-shirt, so he decides it’s casual enough.

Once again, he’s got to be there thirty minutes before the market even opens. This time when he walks through the doors, though, Harry and Louis are both standing at the produce stand. They don’t appear to be doing anything, just talking, but Liam uses this as an excuse to text the group chat about how “sickening” they are. He doesn’t expect a response, seeing as neither Niall nor Zayn have to be work until later in the day.

“Good morning!” he greets, startling them both away from each other. He almost feels guilty for how startled they look, but not quite. “How’s everyone on this fine Saturday morning?”

“You’re too loud, mate,” Louis says, rubbing at his temples. “I’m hungover and in no mood to pretend to be nice to you.”

Harry slaps him lightly on the arm. “Be nice to Liam. We like him.”

“Not when he’s so  _ loud _ ,” is all Louis replies, plopping down into one of the folding chairs. “Did you happen to bring any aspirin with you, or are you just as useless as Harry?”

“I did bring some actually,” Liam tells him. “But you’re being kind of a dick, so I don’t feel so inclined to give it to you.”

“Also, I’m not useless,” Harry chimes in, pouting his lower lip. “I brought you coffee.”

Louis rolls his eyes, but Liam can tell he’s biting back a fond smile. “Yeah, yeah. Liam, I will be less of a dick if you cough up the aspirin. Otherwise, I’ll be an insufferable piece of shit all day.”

Pretending to think it over, Liam finally pulls out the bottle of aspirin from his bag. “If you’re mean to me at all today I’ll quit and never come back.”

“You would never,” Louis says as he grabs the bottle and swallows down a few tablets with his coffee. “Thank you, you are the only person who matters to me today.”

“Hey!” Harry protests, grumbling something under his breath that Liam can’t quite hear. “I’m going to stop bringing you pastries. And you’re uninvited from game night.”

“It’s at  _ my house _ .”

Liam tunes them out, pulling out his phone as it buzzes. He finds a text from Zayn stating how gross Louis and Harry are in the morning, and he’s inclined to agree after watching them interact for the past few minutes. He’s starting to agree that they just need to grow up, admit their feelings, and have sex.

The day passes quickly with Louis to keep him entertained. Business is slower than it was last week, but Louis explains that it’s always like that once the first chill comes in. People will be back once they adjust to the dropping temperature, he says. Liam doesn’t care one way or another, enjoying the conversations he can hold with Louis when there’s no one to interrupt.

Niall comes in the take over the shift, looking entirely too sleep rumpled for how late it is in the afternoon. Liam waves his goodbyes to him, promising he’ll be at game night with a bottle of wine and a deck of Uno cards. Louis and Harry have already left (together), and Zayn is nowhere to be found. 

As he’s leaving, someone stops him with a soft grip on his wrist. He turns around, spotting Zayn as the culprit.

“You were going to leave without saying goodbye?” he asks, pouting.

“I didn’t see you,” Liam explains, fighting every urge his body has to wipe away Zayn’s pout. He doesn’t quite understand the hold the boy has on him. “I would never dream of leaving without saying goodbye if I’d known you were here, cross my heart.”

Zayn’s expression breaks, smile taking over his face. Not for the first time, Liam finds himself breathless, almost as if Zayn’s smile is just too much for him to handle.

“I’m just fucking with you,” he says with a quiet laugh. “See you tonight?”

“Definitely.”

 

Liam follows through on his promise, arriving at Louis’ on time. Zayn is nowhere to be seen yet, and he debates standing around outside and waiting for him before deciding that’s crazy. As he’s going to ring the buzzer, Zayn appears beside him silently. Liam doesn’t notice him at first, jumping when he spots him.

“Jesus!” he says, throwing a hand over his heart.

“You’re so dramatic,” Zayn says with an eye roll, opening the door and gesturing for Liam to go first. He does so, finding Louis’ apartment by memory. Zayn follows closely behind, the smell of his cologne almost overbearing. Liam can’t think straight.

Once again, the door opens before Liam gets the chance to knock, this time Niall swinging it open and throwing two wine glasses into their hands. He doesn’t say anything else, just turns around and heads back into the apartment under the assumption that the two will follow him. He’s right, of course; Zayn and Liam enter and shut the door, the smell of dinner almost dizzying.

Harry is standing in the kitchen, mixing something, and Louis is sitting on the countertop, obviously trying to distract Harry from his cooking. Niall is drinking his wine a little too quickly for it to be casual.

“Guess what I found out?” Niall asks once he finishes off his glass, slamming it down on the counter so harshly Liam is surprised it doesn’t break. “Honestly, I don’t want you to guess. I’ll just tell you. Harry and Louis are  _ sleeping together. _ And they didn’t even tell us! The bastards.”

Louis rolls his eyes, swinging his feet casually. “This is why we didn’t tell you - we knew you’d react like this.”

“No,” Niall counters, “I’m only acting like this because you didn’t tell me.”

“This doesn’t change anything,” Harry says as he plates the food for everyone. “Things will be how they always have.”

“Oh please, god, no,” Niall groans, throwing his head back and his hands towards the sky. “Things cannot stay the same. You two are disgusting.”

“That’s homophobic,” Louis pipes in, hopping from the counter to help Harry carry the plates over to the table.

“I’m gay, you fucker.”

“Sometimes I forget,” Louis says teasingly, plopping down at the table. They all follow suit, sitting in the same order they were last week. Zayn sits at Liam’s right side, Niall on his left.

Conversation flows freely after this, everyone complimenting Harry on the meal and moving past the whole ‘Harry and Louis are finally sleeping together thing.’ Liam’s kind of grateful they don’t spend a lot of time discussing it. He’d prefer not to hear the sordid details of his friend’s sex lives.

Louis kicks all of their asses at Uno and Go Fish, a sore winner every time. He throws his cards down and cheers and rubs it in all of their faces until Niall declares he’s done playing. Once again, they’ve all had too much wine and are completely stuffed full. Zayn is the first one to call it a night, standing up and claiming he’s got a long day ahead of him.

Liam feels like he could hang for maybe an hour more, he’s got no plans for the next day, but finds himself standing when Zayn does. He fakes a yawn, claiming he’s tired, and says his goodbyes to the three still there. He’s not sure why Niall would willingly torture himself to stay in Louis and Harry’s presence after all the complaining he’s done, but.

Zayn and Liam exit the apartment together, the cool air refreshing against Liam’s flushed cheeks.

“Not sure why you felt the need to leave when I did,” Zayn says as they stand on the sidewalk. “We live in opposite directions.”

Liam shrugs, shooting for nonchalant. “I genuinely don’t have an answer.”

Zayn tucks his hands into his pockets, looking at the ground. He looks like he’s thinking about something. About what, Liam has no idea. 

“Walk me back to my place?” he finally asks, peeking up at Liam from underneath his eyelashes. “Stay the night? We’ll have a movie night and fall asleep on my couch even though we’re too old for that and our backs will hate us for it in the morning.”

“You’ve really thought this through,” Liam says with a laugh. “Sure, why not? Sometimes I feel like all I do is work my life away. It’s nice to feel kind of young again.”

They begin in the direction of Zayn’s apartment, both of them red-cheeked and smiling.

“I’d argue that we’re still young,” Zayn says after a few minutes. “It’s all relative, anyway. Let’s just do things that make us feel young.”

Liam looks at him out of the corner of his eye. “I’m only twenty-eight. I don’t think I’m on my grave or anything.”

“I didn’t say that.” Zayn shoots a look down at his feet, chuckling quietly. “Would it make you feel better if I phrased it like, ‘let’s get out of our comfort zones?’”

Liam pretends to think about the question, over-exaggeratedly pursing his lips and looking upwards in a pensive expression. After a few moments, he relaxes and laughs along with Zayn. “Yes, that sounds like something I’d love to do.” He pauses for a brief moment before continuing, “Can getting out of our comfort zones tonight just be watching movies until way too early in the morning?”

“Yes,” Zayn answers him, still laughing. “That’s exactly what it can mean.”

 

It becomes a  _ thing _ , whatever’s happening between him and Zayn. Every Wednesday, Liam stays way too late at the coffee shop “grading papers” and having genuine, good conversation with Zayn. On Saturdays, after the wine and game night, they go back to Zayn’s apartment and watch dumb movies and fall asleep on his couch as the sun’s rising. It’s a routine that Liam falls into easily. 

“So,” Louis says to him early one Saturday morning, sipping a cup of coffee that Harry had brought him. Liam doesn’t like his tone of voice; he can already tell where this conversation is going to go. “What’s going on between you and Zayn?”

“You ask me this every weekend,” Liam tells him, barely suppressing the urge to roll his eyes. “And every weekend my answer is the same. There’s nothing going on. We’re just good friends.”

“Have you ever thought about the fact that you’re probably not straight?” Louis asks, wincing as he burns himself on the hot liquid. Serves him right, Liam thinks.

“No, I have never thought about it,” he says with a sigh. “Well. That’s a lie. We’re all a  _ little _  bit gay, aren’t we?”

“I say that, too,” comes a voice from behind him. Harry’s slow drawl is barely audible even in the quiet market. “I’m inclined to agree. We’re all a little bit gay. Even you, Liam. You’re a little gay in general, and  _ very  _ gay for Zayn.”

“I don’t like the way you guys talk to me,” Liam huffs, sliding down onto his chair until he’s slouched as far as he can go. “It’s not very nice.”

“That’s just not correct,” Louis says, blowing over the lid of his coffee. “We’re incredibly nice. We’ve taken you under our wings, taken you into our friend group,  _ and _ found you the love of your life.”

Liam rubs at his temples. This is too much for so early in the morning. “You guys really believe that I’m in love with Zayn?”

“Maybe not in love  _ yet _ .” Harry shrugs, clapping a hand onto Liam’s shoulder and giving it a comforting squeeze. “But like, you guys are definitely crushing on each other and basically dating. You’re almost like an old married couple, the way you guys see each other at the same time every week. We even have a group chat with Niall. It’s called ‘Zayn and Liam should just fuck it out.’”

Liam goes to point out that he’s in a similar group chat about his relationship with Louis, but he’s stopped by the doors of the market being unlocked for the day. Harry scrambles back over to the bakery stand, giving a quick kiss to Louis’ forehead and rubbing affectionately at Liam’s head, effectively messing up his hair. 

“Hey,” Louis says quietly. “If it really bothers you, we’ll stop. We don’t want to make any assumptions about your sexuality. You already told us you were straight, and we’ll take that at face value. I swear this is all in good fun.”

“No, don’t worry about it,” Liam says with a shake of his head. “It doesn’t bother me. I’m comfortable in my sexuality, and I’m comfortable in my friendship with Zayn. I’d let you know if it crossed a line.”

Louis gives him a grateful smile, squeezing his bicep before going to take care of someone who had walked up to the stand while they were talking. Liam watches him fondly, grabbing the coffee he had abandoned and stealing a sip.

He thinks over Louis’ words, and his own response to them. All twenty-eight years of his life, he had never had a reason to question his sexuality. It had never been a question of whether or not he liked women growing up. Although he’d never had too much of a serious girlfriend, save for his last one that he had dated for around seven months, he never wondered whether it was because maybe he just didn’t like women in general.

He wonders if it really mattered all that much.

Before he can divulge too much more into that way of thinking, there’s a hand waving in front of his face. It takes Liam a moment, but he recognizes the hand as belonging to Zayn, numerous rings on his fingers and black ink on his tan skin. 

“Hey,” Zayn greets him with a soft smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “I brought you coffee. I know it’s an early day, these Saturdays for you, and the weather’s especially shitty, so I just thought maybe this could cheer you up and make the day better.” He says it all in one breath, as if he’s anxious to get the words out. Before Liam had met his new group of friends, before he started question his sexuality and friendship with Zayn, he probably wouldn’t have thought anything of the nervous lilt in Zayn’s tone.

Liam’s own lips tug into a grateful smile as he reaches for the disposable cup in Zayn’s hand. “Thank you. That actually means a lot. Made my day, actually.”

“Really? Your whole day?” It’s obvious Zayn is trying to keep his smile from growing wider, pulling his lips into his teeth and biting down on them. Liam doesn’t want that - he wants to see Zayn’s smile.

“Well, I suppose the day is still early,” Liam says teasingly. “Really, thank you, though. Your shift doesn’t start for another few hours. Why are you here so early?”

Zayn shrugs and says, “I wanted to do some shopping before I had to come in. Give myself enough time to shop around and then get it all back to my place before I need to come back.”

Before Liam can say anything else, Louis is coming up to the pair. He’s got a shit eating grin on his face, and Liam knows they’re about to get teased. He doesn’t expect anything less at this point. He braces himself for whatever comment is about to be made, shoulders physically tensing.

“Zaynie, what are you doing here?” Louis asks, but in a way that seems to imply he already knows the answer. “You don’t work for, like, three hours.”

“Maybe I wanted to get some errands done before I’m too hungover to function tomorrow,” Zayn says defensively. “I’m sick of putting everything off until Sunday, only to be too tired and hungover from the night before to actually get shit done.”

“Right, right,” Louis mumbles absentmindedly, as if he isn’t really listening to Zayn’s explanation. “Where’d you get the coffee, Li?”

“Don’t be jealous that he didn’t bring you any,” Liam teases, taking a sip from the cup. It’s made just how he likes - a hint of caramel syrup and more cream than actual coffee. He takes a moment to wonder how Zayn would know that, but then remembers their standing coffee date every Wednesday night. 

“You know who always brings me coffee?” Louis pauses, glancing between the pair. “Harry. My boyfriend.”

“He’s not your boyfriend,” Zayn deadpans. 

Louis squeaks indignantly and throws a hand over his heart. Liam wonders where he got his knack for theatrics from. 

“He is!” Louis says, throwing a quick glance over to the bakery stand across the hall. Harry is covered head to toe in flour, gesturing wildly at the customer he’s talking intently to. Louis’ expression immediately softens, and Liam once again finds himself happy the two of them sorted their shit out.

“The only difference between your friendship with Harry and my friendship with Liam is that you guys have sex,” Zayn says pointedly. “Have you guys labeled it?”

Liam feels incredibly out of place in the conversation, especially with the way Zayn and Louis are looking at each other as if there’s an underlying argument beneath their words. Something unspoken, something that doesn’t actually need to be said. 

“I don’t like when you’re right,” Louis finally says. They’ve appeared to resolve whatever issue they were discussing with their eyes, the conversation returning to a more casual tone. “I’m planning on talking to him about it tomorrow night when he comes over dinner.”

“Good.” Zayn nods his head appreciatively. 

Liam can barely keep up, their years of friendship evident in moments like these. Most of the time he feels so comfortable within the friend group that he forgets the other four have known each other since before they were twenty. It’s only on rare occasions like now where he feels like he’s a page behind them, like they’re speaking some secret language he hasn’t yet quite learned. 

“Am I missing something?” he finally asks. Zayn shoots Louis another look that Liam can’t quite understand.

“No,” Zayn answers after a moment’s pause. “Don’t worry about it, babe. See you guys tonight?”

Louis agrees, reminding them both to bring their bottles of wine and a different card game because they’re all sick of playing Uno. Zayn waves goodbye before meandering to one of the jewelry stands within the market. Liam wonders if that’s where he gets all of his bracelets and rings. 

“He called you babe,” Louis says once Zayn is out of hearing distance. “Does he do that often?”

“I guess often enough that I don’t register it,” Liam responds truthfully, attempting to keep his tone casual. He’d never noticed Zayn’s use of pet names before. “It’s not a big deal.”

It’s silent between them for a moment, Louis looking at Liam with his head tilted and eyebrows pulled together. Liam pretends not to notice, rearranging one of the stacks of apples he’d already organized earlier in the morning. Finally, Louis clears his throat and walks away, leaving Liam more confused than before the whole exchange had started. 

The rest of the day passes in a blur. The market doesn’t pick up much, people still wary of the chilling temperatures outside, but their stand gains a little business. Louis doesn’t have much of an explanation, stating that sometimes they get little rushes that can’t be predicted. Liam doesn’t mind much, finding that it helps the rest of the hours pass by quickly.

Niall arrives right on time to relieve them for the day, wiping away sleep from his eyes and yawning dramatically. Liam wonders if he does anything else that wears him out, or if he genuinely is the type of person who needs to sleep twenty hours a day. 

“See you tonight, mate,” Liam says with a wave. He grabs his bag and doesn’t bother waiting for Louis. He can already see that he’s migrated over to Harry, and he knows they’ll probably walk home together. He glances around for Zayn, but can’t find his raven-colored hair anywhere in the crowd so he decides to head out. Before leaving, though, he sends Zayn a text that simply says “ _ missed you. see u tonight xx _ ”

He doesn’t stop to wonder what that exactly means.

 

“Louis,” Liam says early one Saturday morning, just three minutes before the doors to the market open. Harry had called in sick, and Louis’ been in a shit mood, but this is important. He needs to get this off of his chest or he doesn’t think he ever will. “Louis, stop your pouting and your bitching and listen to me,  _ please _ .”

This catches Louis’ attention, his head turning upward and his hands halting where he had been working on placing out bananas. He doesn’t say anything, just watches Liam with wide, unjudging eyes. 

“I think I’m in love with Zayn. You were right.”

Louis doesn’t say anything for all of thirty seconds, his expression never changing. Finally, he sets down his basket of bananas onto the ground and crosses the distance between them. His expression is so serious, Liam is worried he’s going to get punched. After what seems like an eternity, Louis wraps his arms firmly around Liam’s shoulder, squeezing until he feels like all the air has been punched from his lungs.

“Fucking  _ finally _ ,” Louis sighs, sounding relieved. He releases Liam, keeping his hands placed on his shoulders and giving them a few gentle squeezes. A smile breaks across his face, absolutely beaming, eyes crinkling in the corners. “It’s been months, mate. We were all so worried, you know?”

Shaking his head, Liam says, “No, I don’t know.”

Louis claps his shoulder with a laugh and brings his arms down to his side once again. “Too funny. Anyway, how are you going to tell him?”

“Uh, I’m not,” Liam says firmly. The doors to the market finally open, crowds of people piling in. It’s an unseasonable warm day, and people are taking advantage of the nice weather before it goes back to the bleak winter days they’ve been living with. 

The smile drops from Louis’ face. “You’re not...what? Going to tell him?”

Before Liam gets a chance to make his case, groups of friends and families are coming up to the stand. They’ve got all kinds of questions, and Liam wonders how people can have so many questions about fruit and vegetables. They seem pretty self-explanatory, honestly.

Liam doesn’t find another chance to talk to Louis before Niall shows up to relieve them. Once again, there are bags under his eyes and his hair is pressed flat on one side, as if he didn’t have enough time to wake up and fix it. After weeks of seeing this, he decides to finally ask about why Niall is so tired in the middle of the afternoon.

Niall shrugs. “I’ve been hooking up with this guy, Shawn, for months now. Every Friday we go out dancing until early in the morning, then come back and have mind blowing sex. Then before I know it, it’s three hours before I’ve got to be here and I’m still halfway drunk and I haven’t slept yet.”

“Who  _ are _ you?” Liam asks, giving Niall a look of disbelief. Niall only throws his head back and laughs in a way that can only be described as a cackle. 

“What’s got him laughing?” comes a familiar voice from his right side. Liam jumps, startled, and throws a hand over his heart. Zayn chuckles lightly, taking a sip of his coffee and watching in amusement. “Sorry, didn’t mean to sneak up on you.”

“Uh, no, it’s okay,” Liam stutters, cheeks reddening. “How’s your weekend been?”

Zayn takes one last sip of his coffee before throwing it out. “Pretty good, I’d say. Mostly just catching up on sleep.”

“Good, good,” Liam mumbles. He isn’t sure where else to lead the conversation. He feels too unsure around Zayn now that he’s gone and realized he’d fallen in love like an  _ idiot _ . “Well, I guess I’ll see you tonight.”

“Definitely.” Zayn gives him a weird look, but it’s gone in a second, replaced by one of his beaming smiles.

Liam tries not to trip as he walks away. (He fails).

 

“Zayn isn’t coming tonight?”

“How many times do I need to repeat myself?” Louis sighs, exasperated, and throws his hands up in frustration. “Zayn has caught whatever our dearest Harry has. Neither of them will be here. Without Harry here, that means no home-cooked meal. Will Chinese suffice, or do you want pizza?”

Niall is glancing between the pair, sitting on the kitchen counter absentmindedly chewing on whatever he’s managed to dig up in Louis’ pantry.

“Can you really play cards with only three people?” Liam asks, placing his hands on his hips. Louis mirrors the motion, looking decidedly more intimidating. “What game only needs three people?”

“Uno,” Louis deadpans.

“Right.”

Louis sighs, again, and drops his hands from his hips. “Go on, then. Leave us. Chase after your man. Confess your love. All that dumb shit.”

“I-”

“Mate,” Niall says, butting in for the first time all night. “Both of us know you’d rather be with Zayn than with us. We get it. We’re not offended.”

“Speak for yourself,” Louis says. “I’m quite offended. I’ll never recover. Remember, you can play Uno with three people, but you can’t play it with two people.”

“You are absolutely, without a doubt, the most overdramatic person I’ve ever met,” Liam says fondly as he grabs his jacket and bolts out the door. He doesn’t even bother with saying goodbye, jogging down the stairs and starting in the direction of Zayn’s apartment. He stops at the deli on his way over, picking up some chicken noodle soup. He figures Zayn’s probably hungry, and depending on what’s making him sick, this could be an easy thing to keep in his stomach.

He makes it to the building within fifteen minutes of leaving Louis’ place. He doesn’t bother buzzing Zayn, he knows the code, and he makes his way up. He spares a brief moment to worry that Zayn could be asleep, not home, or just doesn’t want to see him, but all of that dissipates when the door opens.

“Liam?” Zayn asks, voice sleep rumpled as he rubs at his eyes. “What are you doing here?”

“Louis told me you were sick,” Liam explains. He holds up the bag from the deli. “I brought you soup. It’s not homemade, since I’m shit cook, but I hope you’ll enjoy it nonetheless.”

Zayn’s eyes widen as he blinks the sleep out of them. Slowly, a smile takes over his face. He reaches for the bag, taking it from Liam’s fingers and opening the door wider as an invitation. “Come in, babe.”

“How are you feeling?” Liam asks once he’s inside, shoes kicked off and laying next to the door. 

“I’ve been better, but it’s not horrible,” Zayn says. Now that they’re inside, Liam can hear the stuffiness in his tone, can see the redness at the end of his nose. “I figured I’d better skip the drinking and just sleep as much as I can.”

Liam nods, agreeing. “Probably for the best. I can get out of your hair, if you want. Let you sleep.”

“No way, let’s watch some movies. I’ve been craving human interaction.” He leads them into the living room, a movie already playing on the television. It’s paused, and Zayn grabs the remote to resume it. “Hope you don’t mind. There’s like twenty minutes left, and then we can watch Iron Man?”

Liam doesn’t even bother answering, plopping down onto the couch in his normal seat. Instead of sitting on the other end of the couch like he always does, Zayn curls up next to Liam, tucking himself into Liam’s side. He rests his head on Liam’s shoulder, looking exactly like he belongs there.

The movie ends soon enough, just as Zayn said, and he puts on the first Iron Man movies. This implies they’re going to watch  _ all _ of them tonight, but Liam isn’t going to complain. He’d do anything to not move from his position now, with Zayn tucked under his arm and looking perfectly content.

They must fall asleep somewhere between the first and second film because Liam wakes up, neck aching and Zayn still cuddled up against him. He tries his best not to jostle Zayn as he attempts to sort himself into a more comfortable position. He must fail because Zayn is blinking awake, looking adorably confused.

“Li?” he asks, scrunching his eyebrows together as he looks up. “What time’s it?” His words slur together sleepily, as he adjusts himself against Liam’s side. 

“Don’t know,” Liam answers truthfully. “Can we move somewhere more comfortable?”

Zayn is nodding, but his eyes are closing again. Liam knows it’s a futile attempt to try and wake him, so he takes matter in his own hands. He slips out from underneath Zayn’s body, tucking his arms under his shoulders and knees, and picks him up bridal style. Zayn doesn’t even stir. Liam takes them into the bedroom, setting Zayn down on top of the comforter. 

Liam slides into the bed next to him and easily falls back asleep.

 

When Liam wakes up again, it’s to the smell of bacon and the sound of eggs sizzling. He feels more well-rested than he has in weeks, wrapped in the fluffiest comforter and laying on a pillow that smells like his favorite scent - hints of cotton and vanilla. It takes him a moment to open his eyes, and an even longer moment to realize he’s in Zayn’s bed, wrapped in Zayn’s comforter, and smelling Zayn. 

Or the scent Zayn’s left behind.

He stretches lazily, sitting up and listening to his bones crack and pop. He rubs at his skin, feeling less achey than normal, but still reminded that he’s not quite that young anymore. His feet hit the hardwood floor, toes curling as the cold air hits him. He allows himself one more minute in the room, taking in the posters on Zayn’s wall and the scattered art supplies laying everywhere from the floor to his nightstand.

The sound of his feet against the hardwood alert Zayn of his entrance into the kitchen. He spins around, smile nearly breaking his face in half as he slides pancakes onto a plate on the counter. 

“Morning, Li,” he greets brightly. “I feel  _ loads _ better this morning. Thank you for taking care of me.”

Liam rubs the remnants of sleep from his eyes and yawns. “Of course. Not sure I did much, but yeah. Thanks for letting me crash here. Your bed’s way too comfortable for its own good.”

“I know,” he says with a chuckle. “It makes it entirely too hard to get out of bed every day.” He flips the eggs on the skillet, moving with ease. Liam had just assumed that since Harry was the one who cooked for them every weekend, that none of the other boys had any skills in the kitchen. He’s being proven wrong, currently, watching Zayn cook the bacon to perfection and flip the eggs without breaking the yolks.

“Thank you for breakfast, too,” Liam adds once he realizes he’s been staring without saying anything for entirely too long. 

“Of course.” Zayn plates everything for them, setting it down at his breakfast bar. Liam’s always been too jealous of Zayn’s kitchen, how cozy it feels. There’s paintings all over the wall, cabinets and floors a dark wood, walls painted a pastel yellow. It’s been worn in and loved, but doesn’t look like it’s falling apart. It just looks homey. “Do you have a lot of work to get done today?”

Liam shakes his head. “No, not really. I just assigned a paper on Thursday, so I’m sure I’ve got some emails from students and parents who have some questions. Other than that, I’m caught up on all of my grading, and I don’t want to overwhelm them.”

Zayn nods along, eyes rapt as he digs into his food. Liam follows suit, taking a bite and moaning quietly in appreciation. They’re silent for a few more minutes, both of them just enjoying their food and the other’s company. In the silence and with the familiar feel of Zayn’s kitchen, Liam can almost pretend this is their life, as if having Sunday morning breakfast together is  _ normal _ . Like they’re together.

Maybe they could be.

“Zayn,” Liam says. He sets his fork down onto the counter. Zayn slows his chewing, swallowing deliberately and locking eyes with Liam. He sets his fork down as well, his full attention on whatever Liam is planning on saying. 

Which is mildly terrifying. It’s intimidating, at the very least.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Zayn doesn’t react. Doesn’t even blink.

“Say something,” Liam pleads, closing his eyes and bracing for whatever Zayn has to say.

“Finally,” is all Zayn says, picking up his fork and taking another bite of his food. Liam opens his eyes, mouth falling open in disbelief. 

“Finally?”

“I really thought you’d never admit it,” Zayn says around a mouthful of food. It should be disgusting, but all that’s running through Liam’s mind is “endearing.”

“If you knew then why didn’t you say anything?” Liam asks. He can’t find it in himself to be mad, let alone be mad at  _ Zayn _ . “I’ve been dealing with this for, like, months.”

Zayn swallows his bite and pushes his plate away, already done with his breakfast while Liam’s still got half of it on his plate. He’s been somewhat too distracted by this turn of events to eat, delicious as the food may be.

“You were figuring yourself out,” Zayn explains. “I was never going step in and confess my feelings to you and make you even more confused. I tried to keep Louis, Niall, and Harry out of it, but you know how they are. Can’t keep their mouths shut even if you tape them.”

“Huh,” Liam says, sitting back in his chair. “That’s actually...incredible. A good explanation.”

Zayn snorts and stands to go grab himself a cup of water. “Sorry your coming out was anticlimactic,” he says as he comes back to the bar. “I’m happy you’ve finally figured it out.”

“Thank you for being so patient,” Liam says sincerely. “While I figured my shit out.”

Zayn reaches over the counter and gently wraps his fingers around Liam’s wrist. Goosebumps instantly form on his skin, the hair rising underneath Zayn’s fingertips.

“Li,” Zayn says. “Please don’t thank me for that. I was just letting you figure it out. I was fortunate enough to figure my shit out at a really young age. You’ve gone your whole life believing yourself to be straight, and now you’ve finally figured out you’re not. You didn’t even have, like, a real gay panic.”

Liam shrugs and finds himself leaning closer into Zayn’s touch and words. He leans close enough to feel Zayn’s breath ghost over him.

“What’s there to panic about?” he asks genuinely, but Zayn only laughs at him. “Nothing wrong with being gay, I just didn’t know I was. Maybe I’m still not. Maybe I’m just, like, into you. Bisexual, but it’s 99% girls and 1% Zayn Malik.”

“A good explanation,” Zayn teases, leaning into his free hand. His other hand is still circled around Liam’s wrist, thumb rubbing into the skin. “What are our plans for the day, then?”

Our plans. Liam finds himself enjoying the sound of that. Lazy Sundays spent together, eating a breakfast that Zayn cooked and lounging around without any responsibilities. He doesn’t have any complaints about that. 

“Answer a few emails, take a nap, eat some food somewhere in there?” Liam suggests, scooting his stool closer to Zayn’s so they don’t have to reach so far. Zayn scoots closer as well, their legs tangling together and barely any space between them. 

“Sounds like a plan to me,” Zayn says, agreeing. “I’ll probably do some of my homework, if you don’t mind? If you want to stay for dinner, I can make some pasta for us.”

That’s how the rest of the day goes. They start out at the breakfast bar, legs still tangled together, Liam answering emails while Zayn sketches and paints. At one point they move from the bar to Zayn’s couch, leaning against each other as they work. They don’t talk much, telling quiet jokes every once in a while and Liam complimenting all of Zayn’s work. Without Liam even noticing, he switches from from drawing to typing a paper that’s due this week, but they work well together. The silence falls over them like a blanket, secure and comforting.

At half past five, Liam’s stomach rumbles and he realizes neither of them have eaten since breakfast earlier in the day. While they hadn’t woken up until almost noon, that was still five hours ago. If he’s hungry, he can’t imagine how Zayn must be feeling. 

Before Liam can suggest that maybe they make some dinner, Zayn is closing his laptop and standing from the couch. Liam misses the warmth of his body immediately, leaning into the space Zayn had been occupying just moments before. 

“Hungry?” Zayn asks, his back cracking as he stretches. 

“I could eat,” Liam says as his stomach growls loudly. Zayn’s lips tug into a small smile and he pads quietly into the kitchen. Liam watches him go, trying to resist the urge to call him back to cuddle him and never let him go. He looks adorable in grey sweatpants that hang from his hips and a plain white t-shirt. He hears Zayn tinkering around in the kitchen, pots clanking. Liam goes back to typing a few emails, the sound of the oven beeping clear in the background.

Not even thirty minutes later, Zayn is coming back into the room with two bowls of spaghetti. He sets them down at the breakfast bar again, tapping one of the stools with his hand. This catches Liam’s attention, his head snapping up at the sound. His startled expression quickly transforms into a smile as he shuts his laptop and meanders over. 

Zayn has already begun to dig in, sauce on the corner of his mouth. Liam finds it hopelessly endearing, expression softening. 

“What?” Zayn asks, noticing Liam’s staring. “What are you looking at?”

Liam doesn’t answer, instead choosing to reach out his hand and thumb away the sauce himself. Zayn’s eyes go wide, tongue darting out and licking over the spot where Liam’s thumb once was. Liam shouldn’t find the act of cleaning pasta sauce off of someone hot, but he  _ does _ .

“You just had a little something,” Liam finally answers as he sits down. He doesn’t say anything else, digging into the food. It’s just pasta, but it tastes delicious, especially after not having eaten all day. Zayn’s been holding out on him, all those nights where he let Liam believe that Harry was the only one who could cook within their group.

It doesn’t take them more than ten minutes to scarf down their food. If it were anyone but Zayn, Liam might find himself embarrassed about how quickly he finishes his food. As it is though, Zayn finishes his plate just as quickly, cleaning up both of their bowls without saying a word. Once again, Liam finds himself amazed at how easily they fall into such a domestic routine.

Noticing the time, Liam stands and starts to say goodbye. 

“It’s a school night,” he says reluctantly. Zayn’s face falls, but he masks it hastily. “It’s genuinely been one of the best days I’ve had in such a long time.”

Zayn bites his lip, corners tugging upwards. “I had a good time, Li. Maybe before I work on Wednesday, we can grab dinner. A proper date, and all.”

“I’d like that,” Liam says, starting towards the door. Zayn follows close behind, no doubt going to lock the door behind him. Reaching the entryway, Liam stands there awkwardly, unsure of himself suddenly. He doesn’t know if he’s meant to kiss Zayn, or maybe give him a hug goodbye. Normally they share a quick hug and Liam is on his way, but that was  _ before _ .

“This is weird,” Zayn laughs. The tension immediately seeps from the room, Liam’s shoulders sagging. “Nothing’s really changed all that much, right? We’re still best friends, but now we’re best friends who are kind of in love and are going to try this whole dating thing.”

“Correct.” Liam nods firmly, trying to keep his face serious. Whenever he looks at Zayn, he has to fight the urge to break into the widest of smiles, something he finds probably doesn’t fit the tone of their current conversation. “I’ll just, uh, be going-”

The rest of his sentence is cut off by the press of Zayn’s lips against his, firm and the right amount of pressure. Zayn’s lips easily slot against his. Any awkwardness that should be there, due to this being their  _ first kiss _ , just isn’t there. It’s like they’ve been doing this for years, how effortlessly is comes to them. Liam’s never even kissed a guy before, but he’s kissing Zayn like it’s something he does regularly. 

After what feels like hours, but is realistically only minutes, Zayn is pressing Liam’s lips open with his tongue and pushing him against a wall. His hands slide down to Liam’s waist, gripping his shirt tightly. Liam can’t help the moan that escapes from his lips, tongue slipping against Zayn’s and his hands going to tangle in Zayn’s hair.

Zayn slots a thigh in between Liam’s, grinding up and using his hands in Liam’s shirt for traction. Liam isn’t sure how far they’re going to take this, but he doesn’t plan on putting a stop to it, not with the way Zayn is grinding his hips and sucking on his tongue.

Liam drops his hands from Zayn’s hair to his belt loops, using them to pull him closer. They physically cannot get any closer, but Liam doesn’t let that deter him from trying his best. He clutches at Zayn as if he’ll slip away, right between his fingers. 

Zayn disconnects their lips, panting heavily. “Fuck, Liam,” he says breathlessly. “You’ve got to leave before this goes any further.”

“Do you not want this to go any further?” Liam asks, leaning down and connecting his lips to Zayn’s neck. He sucks lightly, not quite harsh enough to leave a bruise, but more firm than just a press of his lips. He pulls away, eyes wide as he waits for Zayn’s answer.

“No, I do,” Zayn says. “That’s the problem.”

Liam uses his grip on Zayn’s belt loops to flip their position.

“I don’t see the problem,” he says, resuming his attack on Zayn’s neck. This time he sucks more firmly, sure to leave a bruise. He follows every bruise with a soothing swipe of his tongue. “I want this and you want this, so what’s stopping us?”

“I…” Zayn trails off, moaning as Liam sucks another hickey on to his neck. “I genuinely cannot think of a reason we shouldn’t be in my bedroom right now.”

“I can,” Liam says, gaining confidence. “I could just fuck you right here.”

Zayn throws his head back against the wall, moaning loudly. “ _ Fuck _ . You can’t just say things like that, Li.”

“Hmm,” Liam hums, pulling Zayn in to kiss him again. It’s dirtier now, open mouths and tongues sliding against one another. He knows Zayn is right, though. They should get to the bedroom, get to a bed. Liam wants to do this right, at least their first time. “Lead the way.”

Zayn wastes no time in grabbing Liam’s wrist and tugging him down the hallway. He kicks open his bedroom door, throwing himself onto the bed. Liam follows, falling more ungracefully. Before Liam even regains his bearings, Zayn has his sweatpants around his ankles and shirt thrown somewhere in the room.

“It’s hot, how desperate you are,” Liam says, trying to keep the shakiness from his voice. He’s incredibly turned on, but also just as nervous. He’s never been with a guy before, and he doesn’t want to mess this up. “All for me.”

“All for you,” Zayn agrees, kicking his sweatpants from his ankles and pulling Liam on top of him. He doesn’t push for Liam to take off his clothes, but Liam does anyway. He sits up and pulls his shirt over his head, leaning back down and feeling the press of his and Zayn’s skin against one another. Liam grinds his hips down, able to feel Zayn better now that only Zayn’s thin boxers and his jeans seperate them. He decides that’s not enough, though, unbuttoning his jeans and rolling over to kick them from his legs.

“Zayn,” Liam says, rolling onto his side to connect their eyes. Zayn’s hand tentatively reaches out, sliding up Liam’s waist. “You know I’ve never done this before. I want to make this good for you.”

Zayn’s expression softens, mouth falling open slightly as he presses Liam down onto his back and climbs onto his hips.

“I feel like I should be the one saying that to you,” Zayn says. “I should be the one who makes this good for you.”

“I know you will,” Liam says confidently. “I know.”

Instead of replying, Zayn just leans forward and kisses him gently, scratching his nails against Liam’s scalp. They kiss like that for a moment, just a soft press of lips, nothing behind it. Eventually, it turns dirty again, tongues slipping into each other’s mouths and quiet moans tumbling out. 

Liam hooks a thumb into the waistband of Zayn’s boxers, asking, “Can I take these off? Wanna see you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Zayn says breathlessly. He rolls off of Liam, watching with hooded eyes as Liam slides them down his thighs, stopping every few seconds to kiss at his skin. Liam can see that Zayn is trying to hold himself still, his fingers twisting into the bed sheets.

“You can touch me,” Liam whispers. “Please.”

Zayn doesn’t have to be told twice, tangling his fingers into Liam’s hair. He doesn’t pull, just holding on as Liam kisses at his inner thighs. Liam sucks a hickey into the skin there, revelling in the feeling of Zayn twisting his fingers tighter in his hair. He pulls off with a loud pop, sliding back up Zayn’s body to kiss him again. He finds himself enjoying that the most, just the feeling of their lips pressed together and their hands exploring each other’s bodies.

“Do you want to fuck me?” Zayn asks, fingernails scratching lightly up Liam’s back. “I figure it’ll be easier for your first time and all.”

Liam nods. “Yeah, I think that’s good.” He’s surprised at how wrecked his voice sounds already.

“I’ve got condoms and lube in the top drawer,” Zayn tells him, waving vaguely in the direction of his night stand. Liam doesn’t need to be told twice, scrambling over and digging into the drawer. He finds it easily, grabbing them and throwing them onto the bed.

“Can I try something?” Liam asks cautiously. 

“Anything, babe,” Zayn says softly. 

“Can I eat you out?”

The air in the room stills. Liam can see Zayn’s breath catch in his throat, body motionless, as if he’s afraid he’ll scare Liam away if he makes too sudden a movement or sound.

Finally, Zayn breaks the silence. 

“ _ Yes _ ,” he says, desperation evident in his tone. Almost as if he can’t stop himself, his hips buck up. Liam finally looks at his cock, laying heavily against his stomach, leaking precum. As confidently as he can, he reaches a hand out and strokes, wrapping it more firmly as he pumps. Zayn bucks his hips again, this time into Liam’s hand. “So good at this, Li.”

Gaining confidence, Liam strokes faster, admiring the sounds he’s managing to pull from Zayn. Eventually, he slows his hand and pulls off completely. He presses his hands against Zayn’s inner thighs, encouraging him to spread his legs. Zayn does so willingly, knees bent and feet planted on the floor.

“Might be easier on my stomach,” Zayn says, glancing down at where Liam has situated himself between his thighs.

“No,” Liam says. “I want to be able to see you. I want you to see me.”

Zayn’s cock twitches at that. “ _ Fuck _ .” It seems to be one of the few words he’s able to remember.

Liam braces his hands against the crease of Zayn’s thighs, thumbs brushing against his hole. He leans in, using his thumbs to keep Zayn spread, and presses the flat of his tongue against his hole. Zayn’s body tenses, fingers curling into the sheets again. Feeling more confident, Liam licks again, firmer this time.

He gets messy with it, no real technique. Whatever he’s doing seems to be working, Zayn having thrown an arm over his face and an endless string of moans and gasps pouring from his mouth. Liam finds himself enjoying it, enjoying the way he can make Zayn fall apart with his tongue.

“More, Liam, please,” Zayn begs, thighs tightening around Liam. He decides he’s tortured Zayn enough and sits up, reaching for the lube.

He lathers his fingers up, warming it between his fingertips. He presses one finger into Zayn, slowly, watching as Zayn’s face changes. His mouth falls open, eyes rolling back. Liam, spurred on by Zayn’s reaction, pumps it in faster, quickly adding a second finger. He crooks them, searching for Zayn’s prostate. He doesn’t expect to find it, as inexperienced as he is, but he does, watching the way it sets Zayn off.

“God fucking  _ dammit _ ,” Zayn all but whimpers. “I thought you’ve never done this before.”

Liam shrugs, slipping in a third finger. “I haven’t.”

“I think you’re a liar,” Zayn says, but it doesn’t hold much bite to it, with the way he moans at the end. “C’mon, need more, please.”

“Only because you asked so nicely,” Liam says, pulling out his fingers and wiping them on the sheets next to him. He’ll do Zayn’s laundry afterwards, after they’re all fucked out. He has other priorities. He doesn’t waste time with rolling the condom on, applying more lube to himself. He pumps himself one time before lining up. “Are you ready, babe?”

Zayn nods, his hands coming up to grip at Liam’s shoulders. “Yes,  _ yes _ .”

Liam presses him, watching the way Zayn’s mouth falls open in a silent moan and revelling in the feeling of Zayn’s fingertips digging into the skin of his shoulder. He hopes there’ll be bruising in the morning. 

He goes to ask Zayn if he’s okay, with the way he’s gone silent and slack jawed, but then Zayn starts bucking his hips. 

“More, more, more,” he begs, hands sliding down Liam’s back. He grips onto Liam’s hips in an effort to get him moving. Liam doesn’t need to be asked twice, slowly pulling out and snapping back in. He sets a steady pace, watching as Zayn bounces up further on the bed, pulling him back down by his hips. 

“Feel good, babe?” Liam asks, looking for reassurance. Zayn can only nod, whimpers falling from his lips. 

They’re sliding against one another, skin slick with sweat. It’s impossible for them to get a grip on each other, Zayn’s hands sliding down Liam’s back every time he tries. All that can be heard in the room is the slap of Liam’s skin against Zayn’s, Zayn’s moans and Liam’s grunts, and the bed hitting the wall.

Zayn reaches a hand in between them, pumping himself in time with Liam’s thrusts. “I’m so close,” he says, eyes rolling back into his head as Liam’s drills into his spot. 

Liam slaps his hand away, taking over. He gets sloppy with it, wanting to watch both Zayn’s facial expressions and his cock. “Come on, babe. Come for me.”

That’s all it takes to send Zayn over the edge, throwing his head back and exposing his neck. Liam leans down and bites at it, leaving another bruise. Zayn’s come covers both of their chests, only adding to the slide of their skin against one another.

Liam’s so close, thrusts uneven as he chases his own orgasm. Zayn’s obviously fucked out, mouth slack as he runs his fingers lazily through Liam’s hair, a sharp contrast to the way Liam is fucking into him. 

“I want you to come on my stomach,” he whispers in Liam’s ear, nibbling at his earlobe. Liam’s hips stutter to a stop as he pulls out, sliding the condom off. He adjusts his position so he’s hovering more over Zayn and starts stroking himself, only needing to stroke himself a handful of times before he’s spilling all over Zayn’s chest.

As soon as he’s done, he collapses immediately onto Zayn’s chest. He knows they’re going to stick together once the come is dried, but he can’t find himself to care. He just needs to lay there for a moment, pressed against Zayn.

“Babe,” Zayn says, poking at Liam’s cheeks. Liam grunts in response. “C’mon, babe. We need to shower. I’ll wash your hair for you and everything.”

Liam sighs dramatically, but pushes himself up, extending a hand to Zayn to pull him up as well. He presses a sweet kiss to Zayn’s temple before leading them to the bathroom, as if it’s his apartment and not Zayn’s.

They take longer in the shower than necessary, pressing sweet kisses to each other’s soapy skin and taking their time washing one another’s hair. Zayn hands him the fluffiest towel when they get out and goes in search of clothes for them to wear.

“I’ll need to go home at some point,” Liam says once they’re dressed. He watches Zayn climb into bed with a fond expression his face. “I’ve got to teach in the morning.”

Zayn pats the bed next to him, already wrapped in his fluffy comforter. “Go home in the morning. Sleep now,” he says, eyes already slipping shut.

Liam doesn’t even bother arguing.

  
  


When Zayn and Liam tell the other guys, Harry hands over a five dollar bill to Louis and Niall fist pumps into the air spectacularly. He cheers loudly. 

“I knew we would never  _ actually _  befriend a straight guy.”

**Author's Note:**

> check out the [fic post](http://microlouis.tumblr.com/post/183454458170/get-a-little-bit-nervous-liam-goes-to-say) if you want!


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